Friday, 13 March 2009
i got my 3 little dia de los muertos boxing skellie's today!they're tiny!but awesome<3 i really need to get a little shelf put up so i can create a little day of the dead shrine.i have my religious one already,so it's time for a mexican themed one i think:)i spent a couple of hours late last ngiht tidying up our room and moving a few things round,it looks good:)mikee's drums still have nowhere to go unfortunately:( poor little drums...but i'm sure they're nice and cosy in our room.i love mikee's stuff being around,makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside:D and i felt bad when he was living out of boxes,tis not right!
i was meant to be going out last night to see jo for a little somthing to eat at hers.i was all set until my housemate lewis came in and told me that he and kim,merry and sammi,and jo and craig were going out.did i wanna go?n fucking o.it really pissed me off for some reason.i think it was because lately i feel like lewis doesn't wanna socialise,which is silly because you should never just rely on your girlfriend/boyfriend.i understand it's a new thing for him,but it's not easy sharing a flat with people you get the feeling don't want you there.even if you pay half to live there anyway!also,sammi was very off with me the last time i saw her.all stems to me moving her down my friends list on myspace.silly,but i guess it can still hurt to feel you've been "demoted",even if it is just on myspace!BUT i had reasons.i don't hear from sammi very much at all.i still feel a little bit hurt at how things turned out,i don't like to give my all to a friendship and then realise that there may have been another motive to it.ie.getting close to me so she could move in when hazel had left.also the way that things went with kate,both the admittance that she had slagged me off to old dopehead.and also that apparently sammi knew that fucking nightmare party was going ahead,as she told lewis/mikee (can't remember which!) that it was advertised on facebook the day before.a heads up would have been nice.so there are my reasons,and i stick by them.so yeah,if you've been an amazingly sweet friend,and we have lots of great texts from each other and you text me to say hi,then you have a right to be mad at me for moving you down.but if you're not,then expect it a little.anyway,when me and sam and saffy were at the gatekeeper last week,we saw sammi.i made a lot of effort to smooth things over.but it takes two to fix something.so ah well,i tried.back to why i felt pissed off though.i just knew that jo's going out later plans would affect our dinner.because you can't go to someone's to eat at 7pm,knowing they are going out to a club a few hours later,without feeling that they need you to leave so they can get ready.and i guess i felt miffed that the other plans had kinda crashed in on our dinner date that was arranged first.maybe non-intentional,but it got me in a bad mood and i cancelled.poor jo,i think she felt bummed but i assured her it wasn't her.just me being in a pissed off at people mood.i was gonna take muffins too.and apparently jo had got me a winter fruits kopparberg,bless her.ah well.i feel so antisocial lately and it doesn't feel good.i wish i didn't hate so many people at the moment!
feeling very disillusioned!hmmmm.
tonight though i may be going to a gig with mikee,not sure if he wants me to go as i'm not really into the band (they're called active slaughter)but it's a nice night out in bristol and we don't often go to gigs together.plus he's working all weekend so it'd be nice to see him tonight:)