Thursday 31 December 2009

i will post later

once i have been into town and got a few things done:)and i'm thinking of putting together a little giveaway to thank all you lovely 59 people for following me,it means a lot x

Tuesday 29 December 2009

another month coming up,another craft fair...


mikee is a pro at making posters as he puts on bands/musicians.

i made my button...

gimme yours?i would link you to where i got my button tutorial from,but it didn't work too good and i had to pinch some of my fellow bloggers codes to get my button to work totally(ie.link to my blog)!

Monday 28 December 2009

so there was something

making me very angry,and also upset,over my christmas stay in wolves.my mom lives in a suburban area,but really randomly,there is a farm opposite her.i don't like farms and i don't like farmers.i'm sure some are lovely,but what they do...their view of animals as a commodity...it's just plain wrong.

anyway,there are quite a few feral cats around the area,that my mom and her neighbours often feed.i do feel bad for this little lot,as they can't have an easy life.no regular feeding times and no home to go into.they're out in all weathers,and i saw them huddling up on my mom's doorstep a few nights (as well as the neighbours') and it was snowy out.i so badly wanted to let them in and feed them,let them get warm.but i know they most likely wouldn't want to come in,it's against
their nature being feral (wild) cats.

but you see,this farmer also has 4 kittens.apparently one of his cats gave birth to two of them,and the other two,the farmers daughter 'adopted' from an animal shelter.these kittens are not feral cats,they are regular,domesticated,tiny kittens.

one kitten in particular ran over to me a few times,crying to come in.she (she looked like a girl,so pretty!) and one of the other kittens even got in at one point,but i had to put them back out.mainly as my mom has a cat who would not take kindly to them.

it has been really freaking freezing over the last week or so.these little darlings should not be left outside.my mom knows the farmer,who is around his mid-eighties,and his daughter,who does a lot around the farm.so she knows that they prefer the kittens to be outside.they see these kittens as 'mice/rat catchers' and don't feed them much.they obviously don't care for them.it broke my heart to see these cats/kittens outside in the cold.i so desperately wanted to do something,but as it wasn't my house i couldn't.i did feed them a lot though,and petted and stroked the kittens as much as i could when i saw them.the feral cats would never let anyone stroke them,totally against their nature!

this farmer also has a dog,who you hear bark from time to time.i asked my mom if this dog was always chained up outside and she said yes.apparently this dog is tied up all the time,day and night,outside.this is awful.beyond awful.what a waste of a beautiful creatures life,and just so cruel.it made me even angrier.i wish that my mom didn't live across the road and know these people.i know that something could maybe be sorted out to help these neglected animals out,but it's a tricky situation.my dad suggested reporting them to the rspca.i am considering this,but i can't see them taking it seriously (it would mainly be about the dog,as there wouldn't be 'evidence'as such when it comes to the kittens).

things like this make me feel so many emotions.i felt so helpless.

but on a brighter note,here's some photos of the cat's at feeding time!






christmas with wolves


get it?cuz i'm from wolverhampton (wolves for short)?!ahem,anyway!hope you have all had a fab christmas,have enjoyed reading all the posts and looking at the pretty pictures!i have only got back to cardiff this afternoon,since wednesday 23rd i have been with my family in wolves.it was a good christmas,but i think most families find that they have arguments over this period...well,maybe!i stayed at my moms the whole time (except for last night,i stayed over at my dads),and slept on this awesome blow up bed that takes like 60 seconds literally to inflate!beats sleeping on the floor (my mom lives in a one bedroom bungalow)!but,it will be nice to be back in my own bed tonight (even if we do desperately need a new one!)anywho,here's some photos!

the vegan cupcakes i brought from kitty of Alternicakes!

yumyum

my dad and elder brother robert (jasmine's dad)

is jasmine one of the only not-even 3 year olds to have a portable dvd player?not sure i'm keen on the idea,but she does seem to love it!

my brothers wife and jasmine's mom,tracy...and of course jasmine!

jasmine opening one of her presents<3

my twin brother,kevin

pretty tree:)

Wednesday 23 December 2009

hey,i'm a douche

So I feel a little silly that I stopped following someone because they trashed twilight.gah,I can't help it,I get passionate!oops,but yes,I can be a douche.

At the moment I am lying in bed blogging on the crackberry,I'm at my moms y'see,so no laptop action for me.it's kinda nice to have a break,I do spend too much time online.but having the blackberry now means I can still go online.just in a smaller,and more frustrating,way.

Today I got the train to wolves,to spend christmas with the boys.its always hard leaving mikee and them.as well as my own things.I'm a homely kinda gal,like my home surroundings.but hey,it's christmas,so I guess I just need to get on with it.I won't be back in cardiff now until sunday now,so I will be so glad to see the boys on my return!
Nb. I always call bambi and bela 'the boys' or 'the little men',and also lump mikee into it,when the occasion arises!

Today has been a good day.my mom picked me up from town,after I had collected some vegan cupcakes I had ordered from a lovely lady called kitty,who runs a cake company called alternicakes.she is an absolute darling,so friendly and chatty.and the cakes...mmmm.delicious!(I will post pics when I can get to a computer).
My mom and I went to the pub we usually eat at,where we have a carvery,but without the meat obviously.my mom's not even veggie but doesn't want to eat meat around me,even though I assure her it's okay to!to be honest though,I know she feels bad about the way meat is produced etc.,so I think she enjoys the odd veggie meal.
By the way,for those that may not know,a carvery is where you go up and help yourself to roast vegetables,and you can pick your meat,if you eat it obviously!

After the pub,we went to morrisons supermarket,as I needed to pick up some vegan friendly treats for the next few days.it was manic in there and I was glad to get out of there!the rest of the afternoon was spent at my moms,eating,napping and watching tv!I don't watch tv at all,so it's more of a novelty nowadays for me.I think my tv interest was replaced by the internet a few years ago.ah,the wonders of streaming!

Not long after we had been back,one of the cats from the farm across the road came over.we call her 'pretty cat',she has the cutest little face!my mom feeds them fairly regularly as they are feral cats,and the farmer won't feed them as he wants them to catch mice.I don't like farming and the people that use animals for their own devices,so this doesn't endear me to them any more!a tiny kitten also came over,mewing away and rubbing up to me.apparently the 4 kittens over there do get fed,but are still treated as less than pets.it broke my heart to see this little gorgeoud creature outside in the freezing cold.

So now,after a fairly long day,I'm gonna try sleep as it's fairly late.I hope you're all well and enjoying the christmas festivites!and I noticed I now have 57 followers!that is crazy,but awesome!thank you so much!you all make me feel all warm and fuzzy!:
) xxx

Tuesday 22 December 2009

looking back

having just read a truly inspiring post by the wonderful danielle (sometimes sweet),i thought i would share a little something about a similar experience.not that i would say similar in the usual sense,just similar in that (like most young women) we have both experienced eating disorders.

as i'm writing this,i am actually wondering if i will complete this post even.i'm not fond of looking back,and especially at upsetting parts of my life.but i can but try!

so...at the age of 15,i was admitted to rhodes farm clinic in london.rhodes farm is a well-known eating disorders unit,in mill hill,london.i was admitted as my doctors had said it was either something of this nature,or i could die.writing this seems almost comical to me (and i don't mean that in a dismissive way,it just seems so crazy looking back at it all) but it is the truth,though i wish it weren't.after probably around a year of simply not eating/eating as little as i could get away with,i had managed to get to around 4 and a half stone.i think i was a little under 5 foot then.the doctors said that my heart could very easily give out as i had so little about me.thinking back on all of this,and of how i endangered my own life,i feel ashamed and full of regret.but i guess we can only learn from these kinds of mistakes.

the idea of going to live in london,so far away from my family,was hard.but i have to be honest,i was 100% in the grip of anorexia by then,and it really didn't have a big impact on me.you would think maybe i would suddenly see what i was doing and try to change,but i didn't.i remember even then,as we went to have a drink in a cafe close to the clinic,my mom told me if i could just drink the glass of coke in front of me,i could go home with them,and we would work through it together.but i couldn't,or namely wouldn't,do it.i think that i had always known that it would take being admitted into hospital to make me change.how sad is that?

so,the year leading up to this,had been hard.what i put my family through haunts me to this day,and i,and they,will never fully recover from it.what had started as cutting out this and that,here and there,had turned into eating as little as physically possible.but by the end of this,i could no longer get away with this without a struggle.

it was very easy at the start,to cut out things from my diet.i had always loved food,though i had never been overweight.so i doubt my parents worried about me eating a little less chocolate or sweets.but as most anorexics or bulimics will say,it got a lot more severe.i had a shoebox full of unopened chocolate bars under my bed.eating disorders make you very sneaky by nature.i would make a big show of taking a chocolate bar up to my room,but then of course would just hide it under my bed.i became very good at hiding what i was up to.though i never really did the whole 'hiding food in a napkin' while eating a meal at the dining table.maybe because we mostly ate our meals on trays on our laps!?(you have to find some humour somewhere i think!)

school too was pretty easy,even when a teacher began sitting with me at lunchtimes to make sure i ate (as requested by my mom).i found a way round that,and simply disposed of the food while they weren't looking.i don't think they had experienced this with a pupil before,and i used to see the pity and confusion in the teachers' eyes.

so this went on for around a year.at the end of the year,i was avoiding liquids.i had this horrible routine of feeling my bones while in bed every night.feeling every rib,feeling my hipbones...to this day,the idea of feeling my bones through my skin makes me feel physically sick.my mom was screaming at me just to eat and to drink.

i think most people who have been through bad points in their life (which is probably just about everyone) tend to remember a couple of key moments,where they knew things had gotten bad,and beyond the point of an easy return.

i remember one night,feeling so thirsty.that i rushed to the bathroom and drank a glass of water.immediately after,i felt so guilty.so upset that i had given in,and i truly thought that this water was going to put weight on me.so i went to the toilet,hoping i could just go...kind of a bulimic way of thinking,but not vomiting.crazy,i know...

and another memory,of hearing my mom crying out and sobbing in the night for me to get better.even in the closed mind i was in,this chilled me to my soul.and i remember feeling pain at what i was doing to her,and to my family.

i'm glad to say that once i was in the clinic,i started to do a complete u-turn.it's hard to understand.how i could so quickly change my thinking...there were so many girls in there,still resisting against the eating regime,and wanting to lose more weight.but it seems once i was in there,something inside me sparked,and i knew i had to get better so i could go home.

it was a tough 16 weeks there,though i did get to speak to my family and see them once a week.it had it's highs;getting to go and eat in the other kitchen,where we could supervise ourselves and just generally be more relaxed;reaching my targets early and getting to go home on weekends every week;meeting new people(though i could never really appreciate that,we must have all been in so much mental anguish then).it had it's lows;being away from my family,and knowing how much suffering i was putting them through;not long before my leaving date,i started having some kind of panic attack at mealtimes,it got to the point where i was moved back into the supervised kitchen.it would take me over an hour to eat my meal,and then i would throw up.this even happened at the table.and i felt such shame and such embarassment.i will never figure out why,after doing so well and not long before i was due to leave,these attacks started to come on.but luckily i was allowed to go home on time.when i did leave,it was hard to adjust and i think we had all thought it would all fit back into place easily.it didn't and it was scary at first,to be away from the crutch of the clinic.i was so scared that i would have to go back.

but,after all of this,we came through it.and i managed to come through it.i have to admit,i feel sadness that i could not find it in myself to make it better.that i had to go to a clinic to realise that what i was doing was wrong.i feel like i should have been stronger.and i think i will always feel that i should be stronger,and that i should stop giving into how fragile my mind can be sometimes.

however,i do feel lucky,as since getting over this part of my teenage years,i have seriously never had a problem with my weight again.i have heard people say that anorexics and bulimics never get over that way of thinking...i can truly and honestly say that i have never returned to my anorexic state of mind.sure,at times i have though,'oops,put a little weight on there' if a skirt doesn't fit that used to.but i have never dieted since,and never worried over it.not one bit.i don'tknow why this is.i do think maybe it's simply because i never became anorexic to be thin.i wasn't massive into my appearance anyway at the age of 15.i did enjoy people noticing how thin i had gotten,and if i heard that someone had said i was anorexic,although acting appalled at that,i would secretly love that they had noticed.i used to want people to notice.to see it all.and i don't know why.i don't remember thinking 'i want them to notice me!' but i do remember being glad if they seemed to notice how thin i was.but even though i took pride in my anorexia inside,i didn't on the outside,if anyone dared ask me if i was,or if my family lost their cool and brought the words 'eating disorder' up,i would deny it vehemently.i would not admit to it.

having said this though,about not feeling this way since my anorexia...i think similar things have come up that have manifested themselves in slightly different ways.like my OCD and my depression...i always joke that i seem to go looking for a disorder i can have.maybe it's the goth in me?!i can happily say though,i don't want any more disorders,and especially not self-inflicted thank you!

i have always thought that although there are always 'in-between' people,there is usually two types of people.those that hurt themselves when in mental pain,and those that hurt others.i'm willing to bet that most of the people reading this are those that hurt themselves.it seems to be the bane of most sensitive and kind young men and women!

so,i hope i haven't depressed you all thoroughly,i never look back on my eating disorder if i can help it,but i really did feel that it may inspire others to love themselves,just as danielle inspired me to appreciate life and be as positive as she is!now i don't think i'm quite as positive a person,c'mon i AM a goth,but i just wanted to say that if i can pull through tough times,you all can.and what doesn't pull us under makes us stronger.never sink,swim.

blah

i've been feeling really listless the past few days.i think it may be because i have literally been like a slug and not done anything creative.i felt i needed a little break after the last fair.but i think,when i get back from my hometown,i need to kick back into 'creating' again.i think my brain is turning into mush.possibly.

i'm also feeling miffed about the upcoming christmas festivities.mainly because it means 5 days away from my own surroundings and doglets.and of course i will miss mikee too,but i know he will most likely be busy anywho.i go to wolverhampton tomorrow and return to cardiff on sunday.this is a loooong time for me.yes,it will be good to see my family.but i need my space.and i don't get it when back in wolves.and because i'm not driving yet i end up being kinda stranded in my family's homes.i have to rely on lifts from various family members,which in turn makes me feel a little claustrophobic.but it's gotta be done,because it's christmas.

and i'm also in a funk because i'm broke.as always,as usual and as ever.where on earth does my money go?!i don't go out to clubs or pubs,i rarely buy clothes etc. and i don't have a hugeeee lot of bills to pay,just about average i guess.but yeah,i have around £120 to last me until january the 15th.how?!yes,i've spent money on presents and gifts.but besides that and my usual outgoings,i have only spent an additional £80,which is my deposit for my tattoo next month.i am not really a money orientated person at all,especially as a lot of my beliefs are quite anarchistic.but i do work full-time hours,so i don't expect to be broke all the time.it does bug the hell out of me.i'd just like to be a little more comfy where money and spending is concerned,but my funds don't really allow for that.which is a shame,as christmas would be the ideal time to have the cash to go out for drinks and meals.meh.

besides all these little complaints,it is nice to be off work for a few weeks and just chill!i turn 26 in a couple of weeks,which is weird because i don't feel 26!i'm not too fussed on birthdays but seen as i am a twin it is necessary for me to make some effort...i can't not get my twin brother a present!

Sunday 20 December 2009

twilight haters

they make me so angry.and no,not because they dare to have a different opinion to me.not because they don't like twilight.or even because they make super lame jokes about them.no,they make me angry because they have this amazingly arrogant way of putting the film and books down.i mean,one person who rubbished it in their latest blog...they have rather wrong tastes themselves.but i don't spout off about their lameass tastes,or have a dig at something that means a lot to a lot of people.for example,i effing hate buffy.i just do.i have my reasons.but i would not trash it to hell and back,and make snide remarks about buffy fans.and why not?because i'm not a jerk.not about things like personal taste anyway.i just wish that people would lay off twilight.it's even lamer than some of us twilight fans are.and that does include me:)

Saturday 19 December 2009

christmas at work

yesterday was secret santa at work,and also the christmas meal on the evening.

i picked out one of the refuge workers called non for my secret santa.non really likes horses,and i did find an awesomely appropriate (but rather tacky!) make-up bag at tk maxx,decorated with scenes of horse riding.but the budget for everyone's gifts was £5 each,and this was over double the amount.that sucked.but i did manage to get her a couple of cute gifts: a pass/card wallet from paperchase (decorated in a black and white baroque pattern),and a pack of two mini notebooks,also from paperchase.i saw her open them (obviously she didn't know i'd brought them for her!) and she seemed to like them.i always dread that someone is not gonna like the presents i get them,that would be kinda embarassing!

my secret santa gift was a really cute little box of doggy cookie-cutters and a mini recipe book!it really made me giggle,and i was touched that someone would put so much thought into what to get me!i'm gonna have to try bake these cookies for the boys...though i may have to replace the meat in the ingredients!i mean,we feed bambi and bela standard dog food,but to bake with meat creeps me out.i've always said that bambi and bela can't tell us whether they want meat or not,which is why we just go with the 'obvious' option and give them meat.they seem to enjoy it the most,and it just wouldn't sit right with me to restrict their diets.not when they quite literally have no say!though don't get me wrong,they do love vegan foods...vegan spread on toast is one of their favourites,tehe!




so after that little treat at work in the daytime,we also had our work christmas meal in the evening.these kinds of things are usually not my cup of tea,but i do get on with a lot of staff at work,so i thought i should make the effort!besides,i don't go out enough as it is!


the meal was at a nice little bar/restaurant called the promised land,in cardiff city centre.the food was yummy,and i was very impressed by the vegan menu.the starter was mushroom risotto,the main was chickpea and sweet potato tangine with roast vegetables (weird combination but i LOVE roast veg so i didn't mind!) and the dessert was vegan chocolate mousse with raspberries.now,i did say i was impressed by the menu.the dessert was not one of the impressive factors,seriously.everyone who had it,left it.it was so bitter,and the mousse was almost rock solid...you could turn the glass upside down (that it came in) and the mousse wouldn't budge.most people that had chosen it for dessert ate the raspberries on top...but not the rest.the dessert certainly wouldn't help convert anyone to veganism!eugh.

a few of us left around 10pm,and i think most left not long after.it was a good night,and it was nice to be fed(!) but i was pretty happy to get back to the boys!i didn't get any photos,apart from a not great one of my new shoes...


i'm loving the geek look even more than usual lately.

and seen as i'm posting pictures,here's a couple of random photos from the last few days...

lazer eyes!try again...



i go through phases with food and drink...this is my current obsession.i don't really like coca-cola for ethical reasons...but i'm being naughty at the moment and indulging in their cherry coke.eeep.

Friday 18 December 2009

let the holidays begin

today was my last day in work until the 29th of december,and once i'm done on that day,i'm off again until the 11th january!i'm doing a random day because i hadn't realised i also had a few more days booked off over christmas,besides already having two weeks booked off,and i offered to work the 29th because we were short staffed.besides i literally live over the road from work,so one day at work isn't going to inconvenience me much!so,i'm pretty chuffed that i have so much time off!it'll be nice to have lie-in's and just chill out.as well as spend more time with mikee and the boys.

i have finished wrapping my christmas gifts tonight.to be honest though there wasn't much to do,as i'm giving my parents and brothers the money.it may seem a little impersonal but i'd rather them have the £30 each to buy themselves something they really want.and if i know them they'd probably like the extra cash.i know i do!so,i only had a few people's presents to wrap,and seen as i know that besides sam and saffy,they definitely won't be reading this,here's what i got them...

tracy (my brother's wife and jasmine's mom): scrapbooking materials-lilac polka dot photo album from paperchase,stickers and adhesive ribbon from whsmith,scrapbooking papers from whsmith.
jasmine (my niece and goddaughter): winter bobble hat from h&m (kids section),'adopt violet the orangutan'furry hand puppet from whsmith (i brought her a year sponsorship of the very same orangutan a year or two ago.i know she's too young to understand,but i figured if we tell her she has an 'adopted' orangutan she'll be pretty happy!)
kayleigh (my twin brother's girlfriend): khaki furry bobble hat from h&m, orange woolly (not real wool,i do my very best to buy vegan even though the recipients aren't usually vegan!)handwarmers/gloves.

and that's it!told you i didn't have much to wrap!that's the good thing about being a small family (we've never really seen much of our extended family).i do still have gifts to buy for my dad's partner joan,my nan and my aunty.i'm thinking a nice winter themed bouquet each perhaps.i'll most likely get each of my family a small present as well as their money,just so they have something to unwrap:)

it's weird,when i was younger,christmas was almost all about what i wanted (as in presents!).but now when my brothers or parents ask me,i really and truly don't mind!my mom has already given me my christmas and birthday money (my birthday is close after,on january 4th) to go towards driving lessons,and i think my dad will most likely do the same.which will be awesome,my lessons cost just under £30 a week,so their money is super appreciated!

and tomorrow,mikee and i hope to pop up town,where i get to pick out what i want for christmas off him!we decided to spend £50 on each other this year,which i think is a good amount.and it stops me spending too much!mikee had a really dull present (in my opinion!) off me; some cables for his sound engineering/pa hire venture.i think i'm gonna pick out a few bits and bobs from primark.i really need some basic stuff like cardigans and jeans (wanna wrap up at the moment,it has been so so cold today!) and it'll be nice when i wear them,knowing that mikee brought them for me.awwww.

how are your christmas preparations going my lovely followers?

i have also not long finished putting together a christmas package for a girl i know from the vegan 'scene'.her lovely fiance (who i also know for the same reason) asked me to put together some dolly dearest things for her,as she brought a lot at the wolverhampton vegan festival (they were both the main organisers of that event).i have put a mini diary in there,along with a couple of hairbows,a hairband(with huge bow on it),a coin purse/mobile pouch,a ring and a sock monkey.all for £18 including postage and packaging.i think it was such a sweet idea for him to come up with!they are such a cute and lovely couple too!i hope they both like it!i think i might buy a little treat for myself with the money from that:D

Wednesday 16 December 2009

i heart american people

well,y'know,the cool ones.i've always preferred american books and american films.i find that american women around the same age as me,seem to have such a sense of fun and traditions...traditions in the sense of they have 'date nights' with their boyfriends/girlfriends,dinners with their friends and family,things like that.i'm not saying i hate being english,or british people...but i do think that american's have a slightly more fun outlook on things.i think us british gals could definitely benefit from a little bit of americanisation.maybe we already are with our blogs?i know i pick up little sayings and words from blogs written by my favourite american gals.like the word 'super'.as in,it was 'super fun'.i love the word super,and using it as much as i can.

cinema night

we went to see the descent 2 last night.it.was.frickin.awesome.i love going to the cinema.i love everything about it!
creeeeepy

lovelovelovelovelove

cute graffiti we saw on the way back

Tuesday 15 December 2009

some pictures from the weekend


creepy vintage dolls mask...brought it for £2

my lovely russian dolls

this photo shocked me...jasmine looks so old in this...she's 3 in february 2010!


the lush fireplace at my dads

these are the books i got from asda last night.i need something to keep me busy while i'm with my family over christmas!

cherry cola and christmas cheer

mikee and i finally got our christmas tree last night,and considering we only spent £3 on it,it's looking pretty cute!it's a 3ft fake black christmas tree that we got from asda!i wanted a tree to put in our living room,i'm hoping it adds some christmas cheer to our home,but didn't really want to spend much time or money on it!i already had some bits and bobs to put on the tree,and i had brought some halloween tinsel when it was on sale at tesco!it was quite literally pennies!and the end result...

it doesn't look as cute on the photo,but i promise it is!

Monday 14 December 2009

saturday's fair

so,saturday just gone,was the cruelty-free xmas fair,held in kings heath,birmingham.wolverhampton (where i'm from) isn't too far from birmingham,so i travelled back on the friday as i managed to get half a day off from work.then on saturday morning my twin brother picked me up from my moms to take me to the fair!

it had been a real struggle carrying everything back on friday,it felt like my arms were going to break off!but i have to say,my 99p bag pulled it off again.it's a huge plastic lilac polka dotted shopping bag,which you would think could not hold anything.wrong.it holds around 30+ diaries,a ton of hair accessories and jewellery,and lots of leaflets.to be precise.the only downside is that it's freaking heavy,and the handles chafe my hands.but for 99p,i'm more than impressed!

so,after my brother dropped me off at the church (it was in a church hall...which explains a lot) and i had finally found out it was in the hall next to it (after i'd wandered into the church itself a couple of times),i found my table and set up.now,i think this is why i don't find it too nerve wracking doing these fairs on my own.i'm way too busy to feel shy and awkward,there's too much to do!you'd be surprised how long it can take just to put your items out on the table!i was inbetween a stall selling natural remedies and toiletries,and the animals asia stall (mainly campaigning about the awful cruelties that are happening in china to the moon bears,and dogs and cats).

i had a feeling that this event wouldn't be as busy as the wolverhampton festival,just because wolverhampton is a city,and kings heath is a small town.also because it was in a church hall,and that kinda spells out that it will be a little quieter!i made sure i didn't expect to sell out like i did last time.i'm a pessimist really anyway,but not in a negative way if that makes sense?like i never expect the best simply to avoid disappointment,but also because it's always a bonus if things turn out better than you'd hoped!

it turned out to be a nice day,most people are so friendly and chatty,it's really a pleasure to meet new people at these types of events!my vegan buddy heidi turned up,which was awesome.i only know her from adding her on facebook just before the wolverhampton event.she turned up for that one too,and brought me a vegan cupcake,which was so delicious and so sweet of her!she's really lovely though,and she'd even made a few things to sell.she had made some owls and some robots,which were so awesome.she sold most of what she made too,she was so pleased at that!i had to buy an owl for myself,they were so cute!oh,and she brought me a cupcake again,bless her!

although it was a super fun day,we unfortunately didn't make anything for the charity i had chosen,which was the Animal Rights Prisoner Support group.but i did get
to meet one of the members,a lovely lady called lidia.i'm not sure what her accent was,but it was beautiful,and she seemed so lovely!she gave me some ARPS literature for the stall and a collection tin,which got them about £12 at least!but the day was slow with sales,and i only made enough to cover my £44 train fare.i told heidi to keep her money,seen as i needed to for my train fare,and it wouldn't be fair for her to donate and not me.it was a real disappointment and i hated having to tell lidia that we had no donation to give (except the collection tub),but i plan to raise money for them at the next big event,so all is not lost.

we packed up around 3pm and headed back to the centre of birmingham where heidi was meeting her friend,and i was catching the train back to wolves where my dad was picking me up.my bag was still so heavy (which was one of the main reasons i was so gutted we hadn't sold much,i had to carry it all back again!)so on the way to birmingham new street station,i found a market stall selling suitcases with wheels,which is totally what i needed!so after a quick changeover i finally headed to the train and went back to wolves.i did feel a little deflated seen as i had worked super hard to get things ready for the fair,and also because the fair before had been so brilliant.but i did get to sell a few things,meet some familiar (and new) faces,and get to hang out with heidi again,so i didn't feel too sorry for myself!

saturday evening,my dad,joan and i went for a drink as we usually do,then brought food afterwards.and sunday i saw my brother and jasmine,which was awesome,she is growing up too fast!my mom picked me up later on and we drove out to kinver,where there was a little bric-a-brac fair.i didn't expect it to be much good,but to my delight i found a set of russian dolls,that were,if not the same,similar to a set i had seen in a hair salon near where my dad lives,and had wanted for ages!they're like a pine material and colour with gold glitter in places...i will post a photo later on!i also found a couple of vintage items,a creepy 'doll mask' and a tin cup (meant for using over a campfire)that i got for mikee,as he loves the outdoors and things like that!

after having a very short nap back at my moms,i was then taken to wolves train station to catch my train back to cardiff.the weekend had gone way too fast and i felt like i'd hardly seen my family,but it was all worth it.and besides,i'll be back for christmas in just over a week!

i hope you all had a fab weekend xxxxx

Sunday 13 December 2009

dolly dearest at the cruelty-free xmas fair




i will write a review of how saturday went...but probably tomorrow,i got back at 8.30pm,and currently have new moon playing.i'm a little tired.xxxxx